Liking Myself

I'm not going new age pseudo psychology here, and my vanity is pretty much retired.  I'm talking about liking the improvements my Heavenly Father has brought in me, and liking the differences that have come about by following Messiah.

I'm so much more practical in my perspective when it comes to this physical realm, because I've come to a greater understanding of just how tangible the spiritual realm truly is!  I am finally finished trying to be a perfect size 5 . . . HalleluYah!  That was never a practical goal, anyway; and the one time in my life I could wear a size 4 - 5 skirt, the blouses and blazers weren't there anyway . . . But more importantly than that, I made some very unhealthy choices to maintain that size.  Coffee and cigarettes are not proper nutrition!   To be healthy is what YHWH created me to be, and healthy truly does come in various shapes and sizes.  Healthy is about diet, exercise, and rest, not tape measures and clothing tags.  I like myself better when I'm not obsessing.

I was talking with a friend the other day, and we both mentioned the fact that this cold snow and ice can be slippery.  As we talked, I realized, my biggest concern about falling is no longer, who might see me, or embarrassment in the retelling.  I have two new biggest concerns about falling.  Those are, one, to get back up, and two, preferably all in one piece.  I like myself better when I'm not in severe pain.

The best improvement I think I've noticed is not being concerned with what others think.  Oh, now, I want to be a good witness for Messiah.  I'm not talking about other's opinions being insignificant, but rather; they just don't change mine.  For example, I no longer have to be in a relationship that shares mutual emotions.  If someone doesn't approve of my choices or thinks I'm a bit off, I can still love them.  If someone is having a bad day, I don't have to take it as a personal attack.  If someone doesn't see things the way I do, it doesn't mean I'm wrong!  I like myself better when I have confidence.

I spent a number of years not liking myself very much and I'm very thankful that Messiah loves me enough to die for me, and my Heavenly Father loves me enough to change me.  Since there is still room for improvement, I'm looking forward to see more of what He has in mind.  I like myself better when I know I'm doing what pleases Adonai.