Although I have never seen Star Wars, nor the latest movie, I did find myself following the comments comparing the way Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher have aged. Our society seems to think men age better than women, but I disagree. I believe we simply have a different standard by which we judge the sexes. Some folks do age better than others, and while some may remain attractive, their health isn't necessarily better . . . The late Paul Newman is a perfect example of this statement. We've allowed ourselves to be programmed by Hollywood, in that men can remain leading men throughout their careers, but a leading woman in her twenties and thirties is usually relegated to supporting actress by the time she hits her forties . . .
I believe this claim is really based on the premise that men are more visual than women, therefore a feminine youthful look is considered to be more attractive. The truth of the matter is, there is a certain attractiveness in youth that fades as we age, but there is also a light of seasoned wisdom that comes with age which has a different but obvious attraction . . . in both sexes. Statement of fact, unless a man is aging like Sam Elliot or Denzel Washington, we regular women notice the not so perfect traits of the aging average man, just like men notice our changes. For the record, Steve Harvey and George Clooney are also aging well. Obviously I'm using Hollywood as the standard of attractiveness for one simple reason, the names and faces are recognizable to most everyone, and if you don't recognize the name, they can all be "Googled."
We women are quite capable of assessing physical qualities and just like men, we do take note of the deterioration. Now, this is not all men or all women, but I do think even though both sexes know deterioration does occur, most women would rather not be with someone who is in dramatically better physical shape than they are in. We've all seen an older guy with a younger woman . . . and admit it, the first thought is, "he must have money." If he doesn't have money, we begin to analyze what her issues must be . . . I think our society has programmed or at least encouraged the thinking that a partner is an enhancement of one's own image. Older men with younger women seem to think the younger woman gives them a more attractive presence. I'm realistic enough and practical enough to know if I were on the arm of a man, two decades my junior, I'd just look old and silly.
At 57 years of age, I can see that everything on my body is not what or even where it used to be, and although some may still consider me relatively attractive, I'm never mistaken for 30. I do think men have a greater confidence in their aging process, which may come across as more attractive, or in many cases ignorantly arrogant. I can't speak for all women, and although we may not be as visual as men, we aren't blind! I have been somewhat aghast at some folks who really seem to see themselves in a much better light than the rest of us notice. I've seen middle aged couples that have caused me to wonder more than once, what one must have seen in the other . . . and then I see some who look very much equal in the way they are aging, be that well or . . . equally, not so much. It's as if they have maintained the same speed and direction.
Sadly, I think our society has just become very superficial. I know one gal who is always talking about physical appearance and considers herself to be quite attractive. I refer to her with a special dichotomy. She is "deeply superficial." I do not consider myself to be a superficial person, and there is certainly more to a person than their physical appearance. There is one trait that is absolutely necessary for me to find a man attractive and that is a good strong work ethic. I don't care what color his hair is, or even if he has hair. Nor do I care what he does, be it white collar or blue collar, but a work ethic is vital. At this point in life, I'm blessed to know several retired men who retired from respected careers and remain quite active.
A gal named Donna Lou Stevens wrote a song that is not only entertaining and enjoyable, but speaks the heart of so many women.
